44 Wounds

44 Wounds

“Bei Ming is not the old palace master’s legitimate son.” Duan Diyang hesitated, with a hint of heartache in his voice.

“Impossible,” I interrupted.

“He is an illegitimate child,” Duan Diyang stated firmly.

"How could that be?" I didn't understand.

"He was born to the old lady's maid. That maid was cunning and treacherous, determined to frame the old lady and seize the throne for herself. So, taking advantage of the old lady's serious illness, she impersonated the lady and had a tryst with the palace master. She thought the palace master would fall for her, but the successive palace masters of the Underworld were deeply in love. In a fit of anger, the Underworld threw her into the dungeon." He paused.

"And then?" How was Han Beiming born? The conditions in the dungeon were so poor, how did she give birth to the child? Was Han Beiming's health already very poor?

"The old lady was soft-hearted. When she saw that she was pregnant with the palace master's child, she pleaded with the old palace master for her life. But the old palace master insisted that she abort the child and then commit suicide to atone for her sins."

"..." I was born unblessed, and so were you. But your fate was even more tragic than mine.

"The old lady had no choice but to secretly release the girl, give her money, and let her find a way to give birth herself, so that they could recognize each other later." Duan Diyang looked at me, and I lowered my head, thinking.

“An unacknowledged identity…” I muttered to myself. “A childhood without a father, filled with bullying, right?” I lowered my head, forcing a bitter smile. You were even more unfortunate than me. At least I had my own piece of land, and my eldest brother, second brother, and Fei Yu; they protected me so well.

"Han Beiming was forgotten before he was twelve, but his mother was really... forcing him to practice martial arts, beating him at the drop of a hat, because she had gone mad. She didn't get the position of Lady, and only had an unacknowledged son... She probably thought that as long as Beiming was outstanding enough, he could still return to the Underworld Palace... Unfortunately, she went mad, and when Han Beiming was twelve... She waited for so many years, and finally felt that she had no hope of becoming the Palace Mistress's wife... Her last move, her ultimate move. She..." Duan Diyang looked at me, his eyes flickering.

"She committed suicide... She sent a letter to the old palace master and matriarch, leaving Bei Ming alone. She thought that if she died, at least Han Bei Ming could fulfill her wish..."

"And then?" My voice trailed off. My heart ached more and more. I was born without a mother, but if you had a mother like this, wouldn't you rather not have one?

"The old Lady of the Underworld Palace was soft-hearted and took him back. I was only a teenager then, and you don't know how strong I'd ever seen a child like him. He was covered in wounds, but he was so small, yet he stared at us intently, as if to say he disdained our bringing him back. Such a proud little boy, the old lady was heartbroken, and the Lord of the Underworld Palace also felt some regret. After all, the child was his own flesh and blood, and the child was innocent. It's a pity that those twelve years had forged him into such a strong person. Looking back now, I don't know if it was a good thing or a bad thing?"

"..." I raised my head and looked into Duan Diyang's eyes. In his unfocused gaze into the distance, I seemed to vaguely see twelve-year-old Han Beiming, a lone figure, standing tall and unyielding.

"The old lady adopted him as her godson and let him study and practice martial arts with his original three sons and one daughter."

"..." But his personality, once formed, is hard to erase. Now, recalling the first time I saw him, he was so arrogant, so haughty, yet behind that arrogance lay loneliness. What was he thinking when he saw me? A self-pitying child, yearning for family love but afraid to express it, only able to look at Fei Yu, showered with affection, with lonely and envious eyes. How did he see me then? Was it sympathy for his plight, or did he think my background was nothing compared to his? Perhaps he mocked my timidity, my introversion, my shrinking, my longing, because compared to him, these were nothing. So why did he approach me? To help me, or because we were both in the same boat, or to silently watch me break free from the web I had woven for myself? I want to know, what was your reason back then?

"But even a child can be very thoughtful. Those young masters looked down on him, whose origins were unknown, and the young lady made things difficult for him in many ways. However, he studied diligently and practiced martial arts as if he had nothing to do with others. Gradually, he surpassed everyone else. The old palace master was somewhat uneasy about this, while the old lady felt sorry for him."

"Why did he leave home back then?" I suddenly asked.

"Miss reported him, saying that he wanted to take advantage of Miss while she was drunk at the eldest young master's wedding and molest her. The old lady didn't quite believe it, but it's not good to air a family scandal. The old palace master gave him some silver and told him to find another way to make a living."

"And then?" He left, but why did he go back? Back to such a complicated environment, to a family that had suffered so much.

"Then a conflict broke out between the Underworld Palace and the Ghost Palace. The young master was killed, and the young lady went missing. The Underworld Palace lost a lot in a single day. The old palace master wrote to Beiming, telling him that if he could win over the Mo family, especially the Mo family's strength and status in the Central Plains, as well as the Mo family patriarch's status in the martial arts world, he could use the Mo family's strength to revitalize the Underworld Palace through a marriage alliance."

So you came prepared, with a purpose. Thinking of this, my heart aches terribly. Did you only want to use Fei Yu? Are you willing to sacrifice everything for your own benefit? Then what am I? Just an insignificant pawn in your grand scheme of things, or an obstacle to your rise to the top? So you approached me to marry Fei Yu, to steal our family's property, to get Dad to accept you as his son-in-law, all so you could exploit us.

"Feiwu, you're overthinking it." Duan Diyang patted my shoulder, soothing my disordered breathing.

"Han Beiming is so arrogant. He has no feelings for the Underworld Palace, so he doesn't care about revitalizing it. However, he made friends with the people of Han Family Fort back then and took the opportunity to visit the Mo family, which had piqued the old palace master's interest. Unfortunately, he probably didn't expect things to develop in a way that was beyond his expectations."

"For example?" I looked up at him, confused.

“For example, he discovered a treasure in that gray place. Although it was unexplored, he would absolutely adore it. Moreover, that treasure hadn't been discovered yet; only he could see its brilliance.” Duan Diyang gazed at me, my reflection shimmering in his eyes. I knew what he was talking about. But at that age, how could he think so much?

"He originally didn't plan to marry that Miss Mo because he looked down on her, but he wavered."

I shook my head; I didn't understand.

“Bei Ming once told me that to obtain that treasure, especially since someone like that couldn’t possibly remain undiscovered forever, he had to take him away. But how could he expect that person to go with him if he couldn’t provide him with a safe and secure life? Especially since the old palace master could never forgive him for falling for a man. Even if he didn’t care about the world’s opinions, he didn’t want others to laugh at the person he wanted to protect; he wanted that person to be happy, joyful, and carefree. So, Han Bei Ming made a decision, which was…” Duan Di Yang suddenly looked up, took a step forward, and forced me to look at him. “To seize the palace.”

"If he could become the palace master, if he could generate all opposing forces, if he could rule the world and be the only one of his kind, then the person he wanted to protect could be carefree, without worrying about anything, and simply be happy with him." Duan Diyang's breathing was so rapid that I involuntarily shrank my neck.

"For that treasure, he risked everything. He rushed back to the Underworld Palace and swore before the Palace Master to help the Eldest Prince reorganize the Underworld Palace. And he succeeded, though it was arduous, and although I didn't understand why he suddenly changed his ways at the time. However, the more outstanding he became, the more wary the old Palace Master became, fearing that his brothers would kill each other for the Palace Master's position. At the same time, the Eldest Prince also made things difficult for him at every turn, ostracizing him..."

"..." My heart aches for you.

"Then the conflict escalated and intensified, and many forces in the Underworld Palace split into two factions, one supporting the eldest son and the other supporting him. In the end, in order to prevent any future trouble, the old palace master forced him to drink the intestinal-severing powder."

"...A hundred paces to shoot an arrow through a willow leaf, ten paces to break one's heart." I murmured to myself.

"Although the Heartbreak Powder does not kill immediately, without regular pain relief, it will cause convulsions throughout the body until death. People who drink the Heartbreak Powder are almost unable to move, and the old palace master must have let him handle affairs without having to use martial arts, so he poses no threat to the eldest young master."

"..." My heart aches. Aches that pierce my very soul. Was it really for me? I'm not worth it. Absolutely not. You could have let go of everything, lived a carefree life, but you endured so much to create a perfect world for me. It turns out we truly share the same fate. During those five years, I endured pain, and you endured pain. Were we truly connected? Even our physical suffering was exactly the same.

"Han Beiming did not give up and served the Underworld Palace honestly, day and night. Every 10 incense sticks' time, he had to take the painkiller given to him by the old palace master, otherwise he would fall ill, have spasms all over his body, and suffer unbearable pain."

"...I don't want to hear it anymore." I turned my head, wanting to leave.

"Since he has the courage to take responsibility, why don't you even have the courage to listen?" Duan Diyang said quietly.

"..." I do. But I feel so depressed, I feel like fainting. That's right, he can do so much, why don't I even have the courage to listen? Is it because my heart aches, or because I feel I'm not worth it for you?

"However, being as shrewd as Bei Ming, he naturally still secretly formed factions... Within a year, the old palace master... died... and Han Bei Ming also forced the eldest young master to commit suicide..."

"A hermit helped him understand, saying that he was unwilling to abandon that person because he was not yet ready to let go."

"A reclusive master?" I looked at Duan Diyang.

"That is, Senior Binghong." It's him again. It turns out he had already seen through the world, especially those around me.

"After he recovered, he immediately reorganized the Underworld Palace, purged the old forces, vigorously recruited new people, and marched into the Central Plains, establishing numerous informants and branch halls there. Then, he excitedly went to the Central Plains to welcome that person. I originally told him to give them a heads-up first, since five years is not a short time, and that person might have already left. But he didn't listen and went to the Central Plains alone..."

I stopped breathing.

"What I received was news that he was already dead..." Duan Diyang looked at me, his eyes gleaming.

"The person you've loved with all your heart, the things you've done, the suffering you've endured, all for that one person—and in the end, as your time passes, you bid them farewell in this way, separated by death, never to meet again. That kind of pain is unbearable..."

"...And then?" I lowered my head, not wanting to meet Duan Diyang's reproachful gaze.